This year and Decade has been crazy, for me. In fact, I wanted to look back at this decade and reminisce on what has happened.
After the dreadful events that occurred in 2009 (from me being bullied a lot and not getting any help or support, to my mom graduating from PIMA, to pursue a career as a pharmacy technician, but the place she wanted to work at was affected by the 2007-2009 recession and they weren’t hiring, to my mental health starting to deteriorate.), I was EXCITED for 2010 to start, and I feel like this decade was better than the 2000-2009 decade. My mental health has gotten worse, over the years, but I’ve been finally getting around to do something about it. My best years were 2013 and 2014, because of how much energy, how outgoing, creative and productive I was. My worst year was 2016 because 2016 was very depressing for me. This year was also a bit depressing, because:
Earlier this year, I became very depressed, because when this all happened, it was the worst place at the worst time. My roommate’s cat named Simon, had passed away. He most likely had an undiagnosed heart condition and the vet gave him a cortisone shot. Later that night, he still felt crappy (he had trouble breathing), so my mom and roommates took him to the vet and he had a seizure and died on the way to the emergency vet. Then, I found out my best friend/crush named Robin, had moved cities, for financial and personal reasons. Also, I wasn’t doing any good in my HTML and Java classes. I tried going to the teachers for help, but they didn’t explain the work that well. I pretty much gave up and became lazy. I was waisting away, in my room, everyday, because I didn’t see a point in life. I didn’t see how life could get better or worse. I gave up on life. But, after going to my grandma’s house and she gave me a good life lesson and… It was a wake up call. A few days after the quarter, I got off my feet and started seeing a counselor. I’ve decided to turn my life around, to where I can be not only a better person, but I wanna be a hero. Someone to be remembered for a heroic deed, is what I feel like my purpose in life. So, I’m more productive now.
Part 2: Personal Highlights
Aside from meeting all you amazing people on here, my achievements this decade:
- Started school sports in 2010 and I developed an admiration for volleyball.
- Getting all A’s in High School and in college (2013 and 2017)
- Making the Honor Roll in high school (2014)
- Meeting amazing people. A lot of them were crushes and even though they either turned out to be homosexuals, people that weren’t interested in me, or they already had a girlfriend, I’m still glad I met those guys :3
- Graduating High School (2015)
- Getting into a game that isn’t Pokemon (Fire Emblem Heroes)
- Learning how to cook, since my mom can’t cook for herself and I, anymore.
- Getting TWO college degrees (2018 and 2019)
- Learning how to meme
- Turning 18 and 21 (16 can die.)
- adopting my cat named BabyToe
- our financial situation got better
- discovering a love for mathematics
- Winning $1000 dollars (2019)
- Pokemon GO is making me more active
Part 3: Bad things this decade
So… No one lives a perfect life, and I am no exception:
- Many celebrity deaths
- Family deaths (My grandma and grandpa in Colorado really affected me, because I couldn’t visit them. I had no money to visit my family there.)
- Our rent spiking up
- my weight essentially became worse
- my mental health got worse
- my mom’s health got worse
- Adam (my former roommate) killing himself
- bad upstairs neighbors
- 2016 and 2017 can eat a railroad spike and die
- From 2018 to 2019, I used to get very graphic nightmares of zombies and ReDeads (a type of enemy from the Legend of Zelda Wind Waker) eating me, my friends and family dying in graphic and horrific ways, and occasionally, I’d have nightmares of me being raped by guys I thought were creepy, in High School and college. They stopped thankfully and everytime I begin to have one, either Owain slashed the ReDeads away, or Spark’s Zapdos kills them.
- Recurring suicidal thoughts
Part 4: Personal Regrets and Mistakes
Like everyone in this world, no one is perfect. I have made some bad mistakes, in the past, and I’m ready to move on and learn from them:
- Gained weight (becasue I stress eat, my metabolism is awful and my appetite is very bad.) I was once near my target weight in 2014, but I regained all that weight, because of stress and being depressed.
- Not telling my mom about the things going on in High School and in Middle School, because I’ve tried reaching out to her, but she used to get mad at me, for no reason, so I stopped talking about my problems to her, for a little while.
- Always falling for these “end of the world” hoaxes and speculations (the 2012 one was a big deal)
- being mean to a bunch of users on here (especially @SweetiePie) when I really shouldn’t have been. I apologize for the terrible things I’ve said to you.
- being easily confused, when someone “jokes” at me (I have autism and I don’t get jokes)
- me becoming very obsessive over a guy (real guy named Ryan) and I verbally assassinated him, after he didn’t want to speak for me, for a while. I became obsessive about him, because after I graduated High School, I feared being lonely, since I don’t go outside as much. I don’t have many friends to talk to, outside of school and I acted out of fear.
Part 5: Conclusion
This decade was a lot better than the last decade, but even then, there is no such thing as a “perfect decade.” I am very grateful that I’ve met all of you on here and I hope to improve and move on from the mistakes I’ve made this year, and…
I’ll see you next year!!!