“I swear the problem doesn´t lie with me, it lies with every woman I’ve met. 
”
-Incredibly Noble, Charming and Exemplary Liege, King Pygmalion.
Hello, my fellow internet denizens and welcome to Akihabara Explosion’s roll thread. I’ll prelude this by saying that yes, this is still a better love story than Twilight.
Now, as an NA-only player, I must admit that everything that will be said here is speculation since I’m not up to date with JP news according to what I filled out in F/GO’s most recent questionnaire, which indubitably contains not a speck of lies. 
As pop culture would make you believe, Akihabara is associated with otaku culture, which in turn is associated with maid cafes, whose uniforms may or may not include white frills. Marble and ivory are white, which were the primary materials out of which Ancient Greek sculptures were made of (technically Pygmalion was the king of Cyprus, but cool kids always get their history facts wrong. 
). 
In conclusion, according to my very profound analysis, it is safe to assume that the next servant to be released will be Galatea, a sculpture from Greek mythology who was brought to life by one of the Twelve Olympians, the goddess (or Titaness according to certain records) of love, Aphrodite.
Yes, the cool auntie with severe nicotine dependence:
Now then folks, here’s an easy math question for y’all. What is the product resulting from combining a smoking hot Goddess, a ton of ivory and one very thirsty and SIMPathetic (symPATHETIC is also a correct way to spell it according to certain scholars) bachelor?
Answer: the antithesis of an organitarian with a very unique sense of style.
Yes, I love the way Riyo drew Galatea, sue me. 
As to how Paphos and Metharme came to be from the union of Galatea and Pygmalion, you’ll have the ivory stork to thank. 
BANNER
Disclaimer: Please take into consideration that the schedule will change compared to JP since NA was blessed with an early pity system. Then again, RIP for all of you who will try to roll for any SR in the future
SUMMONABLE SERVANTS
5* 
Nero Bride
10 reasons to roll for Umu Bride
- Very good general support unit.
- Works very well as a 4th slot for double Castoria teams.
- You’re into brides.
- Gives you extra padoru rights.
- Free karaoke at the cost of your eardrums.
- She has a very cheerful personality.
- ROOOOOOOOOMA
- You can abuse her Imperial Privilege (you’ll need to have migraine pills at all times).
- For the glory of the Holy Umu Empire.
- Just. Do. It. (not biased at all
)
5* 
Osakabehime
10 reasons to roll for Osakabehime
- Free origami servants.
- Mangaka frendo.
- You’ll feel better with yourself for being less socially awkward (results may vary).
- Gomenasorry!
- Glasses gang.
- Because Assassins are a dying breed.
- She probably has Amazoness Plus.
- Gamer frendo.
- She probably knows Akihabara like the back of her hand.
- Because you distrust your spook luck.
5* wife (
)
Galatea
10 reasons to roll for Galatea
-
. - ST looper.
- Won’t judge you for consuming inorganic.
- She’s the closest we’ll ever be to getting a playable Aphrodite.
- Will keep your Chaldea dust free.
- Getting drunk on class advantage.
- Is an emergency personnel specialized against earthquakes. No more big rumbles in your Chaldea.
- Gundam shenanigans.
- You’re an art connoisseur.
-
You find a certain King pathetic and want to steal her away.Hey, there’s all sorts of people
GACHA CRAFT ESSENCES
City where Dreams are Born
City where Dreams are Born
Min/Max HP: 0/0
Min/Max ATK: 500/2000
Normal effect:
-Ignore Defense Buffs
-Arts +8%
-Buster +8%
-When equipped to a Servant with rarity 1-5, Damage +50% (event only)
MLB effect:
-Ignore Defense Buffs
-Arts +10%
-Buster +10%
-When equipped to a Servant with rarity 1-5, Damage +100% (event only)
Have a good look at the background. Maid uniform with white frills, now my theory isn’t that crazy, huh? 
Junk Shop
Junk Shop
Min/Max HP: 320/1200
Min/Max ATK: 250/750
Normal effect:
-NP +3% per turn
-Buster +3%
-NP Dmg +10%
-When equipped to a Servant with rarity 1-4, Damage +40% (event only)
MLB effect:
-NP +4% per turn
-Buster +5%
-NP Dmg +15%
-When equipped to a Servant with rarity 1-4, Damage +80% (event only)
I’ve been diagnosed with Mephisto blindness, it’s this terminal disease where you can never recognize Mephistopheles in CE art.
Yummy?
Yummy?
Min/Max HP: 0/0
Min/Max ATK: 200/1000
Normal effect:
-Buster +3%
-Start NP +10%
-When equipped on a Servant with rarity 1-3 and 
, Damage +30% (event only)
MLB effect:
-Buster +5%
-Start NP +20%
-When equipped on a Servant with rarity 1-3 and , Damage +60% (event only)
It does look yummy, ngl. Not as tasty as Mapo Tofu though. 
OTHER RELEVANT THREADS
Galatea discussion thread:
OUT OF STOCK? MAKE SURE TO RESUPPLY AND COME AGAIN!
I want to thank everyone that took the time to bear with me and read this post and I wish that everyone who does decide to roll has fruitful results. 
As an added bonus, I had a small discussion with some of the best fashion designers in the world to determine just what is the functionality of Galatea’s 
ig pants. Here is a graphic representation that is 100% based on reality:
Til’ next time. 
